A Season of Transition

I recently received an update letter from Orphan’s Tree, a charity that gives life skills and the love and hope of Jesus Christ to orphanage graduates in Russia and beyond. I know the president of the organization. His parents were beloved friends of mine. Anyway, he wrote a simple, personal note to me at the bottom of the letter. It touched me in a profound way.

What did he write that touched me so? Just six simple words, “Trust your transition is going well!!” I have been thinking a lot about this lately. Transition from living in a remote area of Ghana for eight years to life in rural Virginia seems like it has just been one transition after another. It definitely hasn’t been easy. 

When I returned to the US, I eventually ended up in Patrick County, VA. Since I had no place to live, no furniture, dishes, towels, etc., I rented a completely furnished cabin from friends of mine. They were the only ones I knew in this part of the world. Six months later, I changed my driver’s license from Pennsylvania to Virginia. Ten days later, I was told that the property was put up for sale. I didn’t have to move right away, I could stay until it sold, if I wanted. That ended up to be a blessing because I could take my time looking for an apartment. 

Three months later I moved. I love my apartment and plan on staying here as long as possible. I was just getting to know people when COVID hit. I was really grateful for my apartment then, I had lots of space and could be outside on the deck. But, one of ways the COVID lockdown affected me was that I really became a hermit. Sure, I would go grocery shopping and such, but it just increased my desire to be a “homebody.” Yes, I needed a break from being in the public eye 24/7 as I was in Ghana, with people looking in my windows and stopping by anytime of the day. 

Right now, I’m doing okay. I’ve had to deal with health issues, having had four sinus surgeries since I’ve been back. I’ve gained weight and haven’t lost it. I still sleep with a CPAP machine. I keep looking for a church similar to my home church in Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania. I haven’t found one yet. (Maybe because I’m in a very rural area with over 90 churches in the area. Almost all of them are small.) I am still a hermit, but now I’m a part-time hermit. I actually have a part time job which forces me to meet people and interact with them. I have met some amazing folks here. God has blessed me with a couple of good friends. I really do love where I live….

But, will it ever really and truly feel like “home?” Will I ever feel settled? I doubt it. I attribute that to my age. Little by little, I’m getting closer to my eternal home. Maybe that’s the reason for my feeling of unsettled-ness. Will my transition ever be complete? No, not here on Earth. Life is just one transition after another. I just have to trust God to get me through one to the next. That’s what I plan to do.

Praying for What I Want

So many times I am not happy with the person I am…on the outside. I weigh too much. I have CPAP mask lines on my face. I wear glasses. I definitely don’t like to wear shoes (and shoes make the outfit, right?) My hair didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to today.

Today when I read 2 Thessalonians 2:13-3:5, I could see that God isn’t concerned about any of that. Paul is thanking God for the Thessalonians, not because as a group they lost a ton of weight or because they are wearing the latest styles. He is thanking God because of their faith in Christ! (How many times have you or I done that?) He prays for them, that God would encourage their hearts and strengthen them, not to make them rich, powerful or beautiful. 

It’s my prayer for myself, too. “ God, encourage me when I get frustrated and lose the “umph” to go on. Strengthen me in mind, body and spirit to live the life that You intended for me, to do your good works. And, may You receive all the glory. Amen and amen.”
 

A Truthful Answer

Not too long ago, someone with whom I was talking, asked me, “Do you need to work or do you want to work?” The question caught me by surprise. I hesitated for a moment before I answered. “Both” was my answer. With the way prices and the cost of living have skyrocketed since COVID, to live the life in which I have gotten accustomed to (LOL!), I would really have to tighten up the purse strings if I didn’t work. The extra money does come in handy. 

But, it’s more than that. When I retired and returned from Ghana, I moved to a place where I knew one family. And they moved away six months later. So, there’s a real personal reason why I work, my “want to” reason. That reason is that it gets me out of the house. I meet new people. I’ve made friends. My eyes have been opened to a whole new world! Yes, moving to Patrick County was a bit of a culture shock after living in a remote part of Ghana for eight years, but it was a good one. Just as I was starting to get acclimated here, COVID hit. Then, it was back to square one, starting all over again.  

My job has given me a reason to get up on a bad day and a reason to share the love of Christ by being a service to others on a good day. I have met so many people and have had tons of opportunities to get out in the community. I still love being a part time hermit, but I’m my own worst enemy at times, especially if I spend too much time alone. My job gets me out and about. I feel as if I’m living my best life. I’m grateful for the fact that it’s part time because I still like that hermit part of me. 

I believe that it’s a God thing that I ended up working where I do. I wasn’t even looking for a job. It kinda fell into my lap. And, it’s the perfect job for me. God knew what I needed before I did! Thank You, Lord, you’re amazing!

Wait

 

I really dislike waiting. So much of life is filled with it, and from a very young age. You can’t wait until you can go to school. You can’t wait until you’re 16. You can’t wait until you have a driver’s license. You can't wait until you're 21, You can’t wait to graduate from college. You can’t wait until you move into your first apartment. And the list goes on and on.

Those are exciting waits. But, what about the wait to hear from the doctor? The wait to hear if your company is really downsizing? The wait for your child to come home at night? Some of those types of waits are stressful and not at all appealing.

Then, there’s the every day waits. You wait at the traffic signal. You wait at the grocery store. You wait for  Jeopardy! to come on. You wait for dinner to be done. You wait for the clothes to dry. You wait for your Amazon order to come. There are so many times we have "normal" waits everyday.

Waiting in and of itself isn't bad. It could be a good thing. I think that what is done during the wait is important. It seems as if I've been doing a lot of waiting the last few months. I've waited for sinus surgery. I've waited to look at apartments. I've waited for mail. I've waited for an interview. Sometimes I get frustrated with the wait. It's hard not knowing, it's hard not doing. I would rather know what is going to happen and when. That's not how life is, though.We aren't always privy to the when, where, and how. 

For me, the lesson is in the wait. Wait for the Lord; be strong, let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord. (Psalm 27:14) During times of waiting, when I get anxious or frustrated, I can put my trust in the Lord. I can take action. I can be patient. I can prepare myself for each scenario, knowing full well that God is in control and He has my future in His hands. With Him, it's always worth the wait.

I Believe

This morning I was listening to a song by Lauren Daigle entitled You Say. Today it really spoke to my spirit. Do you know the song? if not, here are the words:

I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough

Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up

Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low
Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know
Ooh-oh

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe

The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity
Ooh-oh

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh, I believe

Taking all I have, and now I'm laying it at Your feet
You have every failure, God, You have every victory
Ooh-oh

You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe

Oh, I believe (I)
Yes, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe

One of the reasons this spoke to me so strongly was that I have applied for a part time job and I have an interview next week. It's been ages since I have gone through this. The job is one in which I'm quite familiar. I have been doing a lot of what the job requires for quite a while. It is through a different agency and my allotted time is coming to an end. I find myself questioning if I will be able to do the job proficiently. And then I remind myself to trust God. I seem to have to be reminded of that a lot. Trust. Believe. So, when I hear the voices in my mind that say I'm not enough or when I hear the lie that tells me I will never measure up, I remember, or try to rmember to trust God. I need to believe I am who He says I am. Nothing more. Nothing less. Nothing else matters. 

I believe. I believe what He says of me. I believe.

 

Trust in the Lord

 

This morning I was reading in Isaiah12. Verse 2 says, “I will trust Him and not be afraid, for the Lord, the Lord himself, is my strength and my song. He has become my salvation. 

In whatever situation I am in - the good, the bad, or the ugly - I need to trust in the Lord. Trust in the Lord. Worried about finances? Trust in the Lord.  Concerned about what the future may bring? Trust in the Lord. Bothered about health issues? Trust in the Lord. I need to trust Him (and do my part, too) when things are good and also when they go haywire. He IS my strength , my song, my salvation. 

An October Fun Day

This past week, I had a fun day with a friend. We went to the Doe Run Sunflower Maze in Arrarat, VA. I had been there a couple of times in years past, so I knew what to expect. That didn't matter. As soon as we drove onto the property and I saw the acres and acres of sunflowers, my eyes lit up. I got a big smile on my face and once we got out of the car, there was a spring in my step. There was a whole acre of "cut your own" sunflowers to take home and brighten up your living space. There were pumpkins and mums for purchase. But, my favorite two things to do were a bit in the distance.

I had never gone to the sunflower maze on a week day. I was wondering if the hay ride would be available. After all, it was late afternoon and the school field trip crowd had already left. Sure enough, the wagon came around to drop off a group of riders that had enjoyed their trip. So, we went on the hayride first. I didn't want to miss it. We rode along the boundries of the sunflower maze. Oh, to see all those faces of various shades of yellow turned toward the sun...it made me feel so warm and joyful inside. After all, how can anyone be sad or grumpy when among acres of sunflowers? 

Affter our hayride, we walked past the apple launching site towards the sunflower maze. We were given a clipboard with a list of 13 trivia questions all relating to the presidents and their faith. In the maze, the answers to those questions acted as a guide through the maze. We got 1 out of 13 correct on our own! And, we were grateful that we didn't get too lost in the maze. Yes, we had to backtrack a few times. But, it was a glorious day and the sun was shining. I love being out among all of those sunflowers!

There's so much to do at Doe Run Farm besides the sunflower maze and the hay ride. There's swings, a jump pad, pumpkin bowling, corn hole, barrel of laughs, double slides, and an apple launcher. You can buy snacks, hotdogs, homemade jelly, apple pies, apples and t-shirts. The hosts of the sunflower maze are so pleasant and helpful. We had such a good time, we hated to leave. We'll be back next year!

I am so grateful that our God made sunflowers. As their faces move and follow the sun each and every day, they remind me that I need to do that, too. I need to turn my face towards the Son, God's Son and follow Him throughout the day. When I do this, I have a smile on my face, a spring in my step and joy in my heart.